Warm welcome note

Welcome to the library of Love Nebula <3. Pharrell Williams said it best, you have to use your library card every day. This is not my work, but is the universes. This is not me. I am not a God. I am just one of many creators. I love you, and thank you :). Enjoy your stay.

Love, Nebula,
Ezraelle and Ezraella.
And Patrick :)

Music Marketing

I DONT WANT TO FUCKING BE AN INFLUENCER JUST SO THAT I CAN POSSIBLY MAKE A FUTURE IN MUSIC.

I know branding is important but you cant tell me how fucking annoying it is that my music can't just stand on its own, why the fuck should i stand next to the artists that don't give a fuck about the medium and just make fast-food music????

I know its so easy to get lost in the noise and sometimes great art is lost to that but please, WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO CREATE TIKTOKS WITH A FAKE ASS PERSONALITY AND CATER TO AN ALGORITHM? IM NOT HERE TO MAKE ALGORITHM MUSIC, IM HERE TO MAKE ART TF

So if my future label sees this just know i am not doing a single fucking ounce of that, im doing the kanye route bitch 🖕🖕🖕

Message to future critics

Tyler if you're seeing this you're a bitch (jk i love yo shit)

or if any music critic is looking at this shit, PLEASE DONT PUT ME ASIDE BRO I LITERALLY CREATE ALL MY SHIT IM BASICALLY ANOTHER TYLER EXCEPT MY DICK IS SMALLER AND IM NOT BLACK AND IM NOT TYLER OKONMA. Fr tho i love jazz i love hiphop i love rnb i love expiremental music i love frank ocean i love that schizophrenic ambient music sometimes, i fucking love digicore and hyperpop though (i know you guys hate that shit for some reason) and i love music in general bro please im doing this for fucking real and im taking this shit seriously.

To any friends who are seeing this now...

Hi, welcome to my website. If you're seeing this it means you mean a lot to me and i really hope that nobody in my family knows im making this shit. Im showing this website to as few people as possible. The music i put on here is not that serious just some sketches, but the art here is cool and i do poetry sometimes. This website is always going to be a work in progress so you'll see some new additions every once in a while.

otherwise, maybe you're a fan of my music and you came to stalk my shit, whoever it is. i love that you care enough to stumble upon this. this is my life work basically. also YES i haven't been slacking in making music. trust me that shit is going to come out i just cant force it. I do want to release it as fast as possible just in case people make music from the same vein as me and its like we're copying off each other. anyways. cheers i love yall <3

"The most creative is the most personal"

I was listening to one of the albums off of RYM for 2025, and it had a David Foster Wallace quote that really stuck with me: "The thing about avant garde artists, and all of great art is that the artist is entirely themselves." And to me it started making sense, why tyler is such a great fucking artist, why kanye is an artist, and why blonde sticks out in an ocean of music that is extremely lack lustre. It's all personal. And the genius artists are genuinely themselves, whether in any medium they propose themselves to.

RAHHHHH

Sometimes i dont wanna fucking work on this website, but lowkey i might as well. this whole month ive just been workign on my album silently and its weird, its weird because i know how great this album is and that i am basically not even showing or bragging to anybody. Nobody knows the genius of this album yet, nobody knows how good it truly is except for me. Its weird knowing that I have this goldmine that no one has heard yet, and its weird to me that i am just living life casually when no one knows what i have. I HAVE FRUIT. anyways yeah im nearing the mark where I start spending my time mixing and mastering shit but lowkey that part is WAYYYY more easier than having to create and shit.

Self Comparison

I've lowkey been really bad with self comparison my whole life and its gotten to the point where i look at other artists around my age and go down this rabbit hole of self loathing and self doubt and envy that it makes me lose sight of what i should be doing: focusing on my own lane. Sure, Lucy bedroque might be younger me, sure 2hollis is the same age as me, Jane remover somehow just a year older than me and they all have these amazing resume, bodies of work that are complete and critically acclaimed. But, when i stop viewing it like as if im in a competition with them, i'm set free a little bit. Free to keep working on my own craft and resume. Art is beautiful, that comparing works and coming at it with an angle of ego is pointless and lowkey ruins art, for me, for my other creatives, and for the future of art. Art's only job is to exist, why ask of it to be more than or less than? it doesn't make sense. and so I am free, and have a better relationship with, music and art in general.

WHEN A SONG YOU NEED THE MOST FINDS YOU

sometimes i be listening to a lot of different music and shit that interests me but in other times i might be in drought or in some other place in my life where a certain song fills a different void in me and it just, fills my existence whole. For example, I think for a solid straight week I primarily listened to a lot of Radiohead and pink floyd but once that zang of novelty left those same songs and others felt stale and i had thought i had hated music now. That was until i rediscovered a lot of the soft lofi anime ost i had in my playlist called stillness. another example which was now, I be listening to a lot of digicore sometimes and i fw 100 gecs but once that novelty of just straight replaying that sound over and over i would get a void for a new thing which was actually nu metal. Nu metal filled something in me that, was in the same vein as 100 gecs and even Frank ocean but it was so different. Which then the phase of nu metal finished and now im on to old hiphop playlists i used to keep in my ipod. fucking whats it called, chief keef, young thug, fetty wap, some drake shit. Its as if my soul has like cravings that balance itself out and shit, but the thing is i never really know what could fill the void in me until i listen back to it and shit or do some redigging mentally, its not formulaic to me at all.

Letter to my 18 year old self

Letter to myself 3 years from now Hi. You must be 18 years old. By now you are reading this I believe it is the summer of your grade 13. You glowed up that year, and you’re still processing that friend group break up. You’re going to meet a few girls, one of them is going to text you and you’ll have a 2 year relationship. Oh yeah and I know you decided to go to Mac for business but that was a stupid decision because business was not for you. I know you thought it would’ve led you to the money but the very idea of networking made your guts churn. It’s cool tho. You’re going to choose computer science afterwards because you think it’s closer to math, and you always loved math. But. In those years you’re going to realize what u truly want to be. And it’s going to sound embarrassing so you’ll hide that desire away out of fear from everyone. You’re going to make songs. And you’re going to be an amateur (hell even sound like dogshit for a while), but that’s with patience. You have always had a knack for production and that is going to be your strong suit but for now, getting your 10,000 hours is your paved road to mastery. And you’re going to be scared. You’re going to be afraid that your desire is going to lead to you being homeless. No you’re not. Just as long as you’re chasing your heart, the universe will reward you how you please. Oh, and, you will experiment with drugs. And your shadow self will be on full display, maybe even dwell into psychosis bcuz of the shit you got inside of you. That’s fine. Use that pain and alchemize it into your craft.
That depth is what people feel. And after you break up with that second girl you’re going to go mentally crazy. You’re going to realize your desired path. And that path isn’t going to be easy. People won’t be on board with it. Obviously because you’re Asian, and your family and friends want what’s best for you, it’s out of love. But be selfish. You know how capable you are when you are very driven. You’ve accomplished a lot of things from just your obsessive nature towards something. You know that. And maybe as I’m writing, the fruits of my labour has not been outwardly shown, so I can’t say with full certainty if I make it. But I have a feeling it’ll work out in the end. Oh and. You’re going to meet a girl at work. And you’re going to think she’s the prettiest girl in the world, but she’ll have a boyfriend, so it’ll just be a small crush hidden from her. As you get to know her you’ll realize your inner child. And when she breaks up with that boyfriend you’re going to be so happy. And, you’ll actually get a shot. Yes, I’m surprised too, that a girl THAT pretty would even consider you as an option. You’re a good kid, Patrick. A very good kid. You feel and think an abundant amount sometimes.
But this pathway helps you alchemize everything. You have God’s blessing 🙂 oh and you’re going to somehow get really good at piano. I mean I know you can’t read sheet music but you’ll keep on trying to improvise and then somehow you’re just going to get really good from improvising so many times, so much so you won’t even know how to ‘play’ a composed song because all you can really do is improvise. Oh and. This plushy that you meet during your second relationship, will be your guardian angel. She is filled with so much love that you’ll need in order to keep you going and see through to your dream. She is your reminder that beauty still exists, no matter how emo you may get, your walls will always break down just from the sight of her, and I’m crying just even writing this too.
Treat her with love. Treat everyone around you with love. Love is the answer in the end anyways. I love you :).